My 31 Day Reset assignment yesterday was to name my values and list my top 10 to name as my “Reset 10”. As if that was not difficult enough, today’s assignment requires that I rate myself on how I am acting out on my “Reset 10” values and identify or envision that actions I SHOULD be taking to honor and fulfill them. It’s really difficult to look in the mirror and essentially put yourself on blast or call yourself out on actions that you should be taking. So here goes:
I do attend church and I also listen to any Sunday messages that I have missed at work online. I also listen to Joyce Meyer‘s broadcasts almost everyday at work. However, what I also should be doing is expanding on the teachings that I receive through studying the word. I also should be spending time with God daily through prayer and meditation and applying His word to my life.
2. Advancement – 7
Ok, so I rated myself a seven because I am advancing myself through education. I am working on my Masters of Science in Licensed Professional Counseling (LPC). However, I am not really trying to advance in my current workplace. We are a small department part of a growing University and while there is room for lateral and upward movement within the company, there is not any room for advancement within my department. So I just go with the flow and work hard, complain often about the performance requirements when I should be looking for a different job position that better suits me with the company.
3. Honesty-8/Compassion -10/Loyalty 10
I grouped these together because I feel like they go hand in hand when it comes to ME. I am honest, compassionate and very loyal. Those are good things but also bad things. Sometimes my honesty, no matter how tactful I am has either hurt someones feelings or just steered people away. I am just really straightforward in most situations. I rate it an 8 because I am slightly dishonest with my teenage daughter. She does not need to know everything about me. I also do not share my concerns and opinions at work so I keep my thoughts to myself.
4. Admiration – 9
I am actually not sure how to explain why I rate it a 9. I have a lot of admiration for those that are in my life and I would hope that they admire me…even just a little 🙂
5. Stability – 8
I feel like I provide my daughter with a stable, drama free household environment. I am not moving from place to place looking for something bigger and better. Although I suffer from depression, I am mentally stable (I am not manic, or angry is what I mean).
6. Self worth – 4
I do not value my worth. I sometimes get down on myself and privately I will cry and feel as if I have not accomplished anything in life when I have so much to be proud of. I sometimes here the words of my ex in my head telling me I am worthless and he wasted his time marrying me. I have to fight those thoughts off all too often
7. Physical fitness/healthy living – 3
I am ashamed that I have let myself go. I was in the military for goodness sakes! I used to be in great shape and now I am so unmotivated to work out its crazy. What I need to do is dig deep within myself, start exercising for my health.
I may edit this post later because it’s getting late and I want to cut this post short. This was a really good exercise that really made me see that its easy to say what your values are but harder to admit if you are following them.